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Chapter One: RegretEdit

Beginnings always seem flawless for you cannot see what lies behind it for you are too blinded by your happiness. I would know; having been in many failed relationships, some not even lasting a week. People rush by me as I walk down the hallway and some greet me, others looking awkwardly at their feet when they pass or ignore me; no one can see the dark bruises staining my torso, cleverly concealed by my thin hoodie. If people could see into my thoughts, they would see the hurt, the fear, and, most of all, the regret lying under the cheeky, quirky smile.

“You’re such a whore,” he says while aiming a kick at my chest, stealing my breath; “Can you go one day without cheating on me with someone else?” I gasp and try to back away but he quickly grasps my locks of hair, tugging it harshly. “I-I-I’m n-,” I try to say but my voice suddenly cuts off as one of his steel fists pounds against my stomach and I whimper, “P-p-please….” He growls and whispers in my ear, “Slut.” Then I feel my hair forcing me to my feet and cold teeth pierce my neck as the blackness overcomes.

After changing into red gym shorts, I tug off my hoodie and look around before slipping off my shirt, revealing the bruises, cuts, and clearly visible ribs. Everyone has secrets and all of mine are obscured under a cotton T-shirt with the Starbucks logo printed on it. No one can know, not even Charlie, himself. “Fabs, hurry up!!” I hear someone yell and I grin, quickly slip on a grey tank top before yelling back, “’’m comin’, fucker! Yeesh, chill your balls!” And the worst part is forcing yourself to be someone who you’re not.

The toilet seat is painted with putrid brown liquid that matches the colors of my lips and I rub my sleeve against them, disgusted with myself. My fingers delicately graze over my sides, feeling sharp bones sticking out.

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